Friday, July 17, 2009

Delusions of Grandeur

It's clear I haven't been having guests recently. Here's how I know: My place is a sty. I like for my friends to think I'm not a slob. As it turns out, I am rather a slob. I try to be a hygienic slob, but I suffer no illusions that the distinction is clear to outsiders. And some people consider dust unhygienic so there's that.

I get less slob like when I have places to put stuff. My root cause is indecision: I set stuff down and figure I'll decide later where it goes, then always have something better to do than decide where it goes unless guests are coming over. I assess the state of the place much differently when I know other people will see it. I got a year's worth of mineral build up off the sink last night. You could eat off the toilet. But I just realized the same can't be said of the kitchen floor, yet, based on the state of the swiffer remains, which prompted the blog update.

I have crap littered everywhere. I need the Clean Sweep team. Mostly, I need to set up new systems for where to put incoming books, financial papers, calendar/ schedule papers, hobby papers, magazines, and correspondence papers. Also I need places to put souveniers, new books, old books, outgoing books, the future gift stash, regularly used tools, and whatever the hell I had in my bag last weekend. When I have a place to put things, I actually put them there, and the space can stay clean, but when those spaces aren't well defined or are too small, chaos is not far behind.

Right now, it all appears to be on half the couch and all of the dining room table and part of the countertop, and part of the carpet. I need the dining table clear so I can pack it up and turn the dining room into the guest room. I need the sofa clear so one half can be used for seating while the other's a bed. And so I don't look like a slob.

2 comments:

gail said...

you sound like you and my dh would be perfect together --- he doesn't get the --- put it where it goes --- way of life either! Luckily (or unluckily for him) I do!

I spent a few days not long ago helping another friend find the bottom of two rooms in her small home --- she was flabbergasted that it took me as little time as it did --- and that she could see the floor after I was done.

hmmmmm --- might be an idea for a new business --- 8-)

CrankyOtter said...

I would be your first (second?) customer if you did start this business. You can sell it as "stop paying money to store things you don't use". Storage spaces are the biggest growth area in real estate so someone needs your superhero power.